[He has never seen a mountain lion. But he has seen a lion, which is larger than a mountain lion, and had looked terrifying even while caged, so. An overlarge cat must be something between that and a housecat, by Scipio's reckoning.]
We weren't to blame, really. I think they kept it shut up on purpose. Like a secret surprise guard.
[Rafael's plucking gets him doing the same. Three white hairs, off of his shoulder--and a fourth, from the front of his shirt, and he wrinkles his nose as he divests himself of that reminder, flicking his fingers together briskly over the side of the table.]
If I'd had some fish, in addition to the bone for the dog, we'd have been all right. I'll practice with cats before next time.
[Scipio, good with animals. Another talent to boast of. He plucks another hair off of the leg of his trousers.]
Or a panther. [ Rafa saw a panther head on someone's wall, once. That sort of counts? ] It was at least half lion, that's for certain.
[ He picks more hair off his sleeve as he draws a lion head in the corner of a room. Definitely remembering that for next time. ] We'd never have made it through the front door with fish, no noble smells of fish. Maybe a bone with meat on it? Cats eat meat.
[ He takes another bite of pie, narrowly managing to save a glob of filling from tumbling out onto his fist. But he does catch it, and tucks it into the corner of his mouth, chewing as he shakes his head and lifts a finger in protest. ]
No, two is the shoes. The shoes made me trip because the toes are ridiculous and we shouldn't have trusted Lorenzo to stitch them up right.
We could disguise the smell. Wear a lot of scent, perfumes and colognes and things. Cats eat meat, but do they eat it off the bone? They've got such little teeth...
[All things to research. He stares down at a chunk of steak in the gooey depths of his own pie. Would a cat eat a pie? Better question, would he let a cat eat a pie, or would he have eaten it himself before the cat got to it?
Probably. He does love pie. Scipio rewards himself with another bite, and nods along with Rafael's comments on the shoes.]
I wasn't sure about the shoes to start with. The curls in the toes. I mean, for one, they made your legs look short. And that was before they sabotaged us.
Did you see the teeth on this one? It was plenty eager to eat right off our bones.
[ But still, Skip makes a good point. Research is required. As much as they both love improvisation, it pays better to be prepared. (And then improvise on top of it, obviously.) ]
Doesn't Three Finger Julie have a cat? Maybe we can borrow it.
[ He scratches his ear with the butt of the quill, jagged and prickly enough that he pulls it away and makes a face. And then another face at Scipio for his assessment. He's not exactly vain, but he is proud. And he's far from honest, but it is true. He concedes with a shrug and a lift of a hand. ]
No man can wear shoes like that and not be a laughingstock. Did you see how the Marquessa looked at me when she saw them? [ He imitates it helpfully, meeting Scipio's eyes with a promisingly flirtatious little eyebrow wiggle and then trailing down and down until abruptly converting to horror around his feet and never quite recovering. He flutters and imaginary fan and mimes making excuses to run off. ] It's the last time we take advice from Lorenzo. The Vizconde della Fortunato and Baron Nutrino will just have to be men of taste instead of fashion.
[He bursts out laughing at Rafael's impression. Not only is it funny, but it is dead on to the Marquessa's once over.]
Maker, Rafa-- put a wig on you, do your eyebrows and the mole, get a gown, and you could be her. You're not related, are you? Because there's real potential there, you know, for future disguises--
[Actually, the thought of Rafael in a dress and wig is enough to get him chuckling again. Not that Rafa wouldn't do it. He would do it, if the plan required it, if it was the only way to make it happen. But he would be a little sour--not exactly vain, but probably not thrilled all the same, and certainly not thrilled if Scipio was giggling the whole time--whereas Scipio would probably wear the dress without batting an eye. Which is why it would be funnier if Rafael wore the dress.
He sighs, a little mournfully--partly put-on, over the concession toward taste over fashion, and partly because he will probably never get to see Rafael forced to don a dress.]
Oh, well. Baron Nutrino likes taste better anyways. Taste means he's not squeezing his arse into tights.
[He plucks at the leg of his trousers.]
Because, I don't know about the Vizconde, but Baron Nutrino? Needs a little extra room.
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carisma_sensei
no subject
Date: 2015-10-14 04:02 pm (UTC)[He has never seen a mountain lion. But he has seen a lion, which is larger than a mountain lion, and had looked terrifying even while caged, so. An overlarge cat must be something between that and a housecat, by Scipio's reckoning.]
We weren't to blame, really. I think they kept it shut up on purpose. Like a secret surprise guard.
[Rafael's plucking gets him doing the same. Three white hairs, off of his shoulder--and a fourth, from the front of his shirt, and he wrinkles his nose as he divests himself of that reminder, flicking his fingers together briskly over the side of the table.]
If I'd had some fish, in addition to the bone for the dog, we'd have been all right. I'll practice with cats before next time.
[Scipio, good with animals. Another talent to boast of. He plucks another hair off of the leg of his trousers.]
Two. You tripped.
no subject
Date: 2015-10-14 04:20 pm (UTC)[ He picks more hair off his sleeve as he draws a lion head in the corner of a room. Definitely remembering that for next time. ] We'd never have made it through the front door with fish, no noble smells of fish. Maybe a bone with meat on it? Cats eat meat.
[ He takes another bite of pie, narrowly managing to save a glob of filling from tumbling out onto his fist. But he does catch it, and tucks it into the corner of his mouth, chewing as he shakes his head and lifts a finger in protest. ]
No, two is the shoes. The shoes made me trip because the toes are ridiculous and we shouldn't have trusted Lorenzo to stitch them up right.
no subject
Date: 2015-10-14 05:20 pm (UTC)[All things to research. He stares down at a chunk of steak in the gooey depths of his own pie. Would a cat eat a pie? Better question, would he let a cat eat a pie, or would he have eaten it himself before the cat got to it?
Probably. He does love pie. Scipio rewards himself with another bite, and nods along with Rafael's comments on the shoes.]
I wasn't sure about the shoes to start with. The curls in the toes. I mean, for one, they made your legs look short. And that was before they sabotaged us.
no subject
Date: 2015-10-14 08:16 pm (UTC)[ But still, Skip makes a good point. Research is required. As much as they both love improvisation, it pays better to be prepared. (And then improvise on top of it, obviously.) ]
Doesn't Three Finger Julie have a cat? Maybe we can borrow it.
[ He scratches his ear with the butt of the quill, jagged and prickly enough that he pulls it away and makes a face. And then another face at Scipio for his assessment. He's not exactly vain, but he is proud. And he's far from honest, but it is true. He concedes with a shrug and a lift of a hand. ]
No man can wear shoes like that and not be a laughingstock. Did you see how the Marquessa looked at me when she saw them? [ He imitates it helpfully, meeting Scipio's eyes with a promisingly flirtatious little eyebrow wiggle and then trailing down and down until abruptly converting to horror around his feet and never quite recovering. He flutters and imaginary fan and mimes making excuses to run off. ] It's the last time we take advice from Lorenzo. The Vizconde della Fortunato and Baron Nutrino will just have to be men of taste instead of fashion.
no subject
Date: 2015-10-14 09:12 pm (UTC)Maker, Rafa-- put a wig on you, do your eyebrows and the mole, get a gown, and you could be her. You're not related, are you? Because there's real potential there, you know, for future disguises--
[Actually, the thought of Rafael in a dress and wig is enough to get him chuckling again. Not that Rafa wouldn't do it. He would do it, if the plan required it, if it was the only way to make it happen. But he would be a little sour--not exactly vain, but probably not thrilled all the same, and certainly not thrilled if Scipio was giggling the whole time--whereas Scipio would probably wear the dress without batting an eye. Which is why it would be funnier if Rafael wore the dress.
He sighs, a little mournfully--partly put-on, over the concession toward taste over fashion, and partly because he will probably never get to see Rafael forced to don a dress.]
Oh, well. Baron Nutrino likes taste better anyways. Taste means he's not squeezing his arse into tights.
[He plucks at the leg of his trousers.]
Because, I don't know about the Vizconde, but Baron Nutrino? Needs a little extra room.