It would give them the chance to fight back against us. After everything we've done to them, I think they ought to have the right to decide whether or not to retaliate.
[He snorts, folding his arms over his chest again. There had been, for a few moments there, some glimmers of understanding--but they are quickly drying up and fading.]
Well, then we'll put you in the group of volunteers. Because I didn't fucking do anything to anyone, so I'm not dying for no reason, just because some-- kid wants to take it out on me.
[Which is the correct philosophy to take. Which is far and away more reasonable. Edgeworth reaches up and draws his hand across his mouth. He'd been holding it together, at first, but Sirius' question had shook him, and he's feeling...shaken. Unmoored, perhaps.
And so he confesses, miserably:]
I'm the only one who can even fight back. Out of all the kids I grew up knowing. All the rest of them, from home, from the orphanage, would just be killed if the Death Eaters came to their town. And I can't even tell them. I have to lie to their faces.
But nothing's happened to them. You're punishing yourself for nothing--being miserable and guilty when nothing's gone on. I mean, Merlin, it isn't as if the orphanage is full of kids whose--
[But that doesn't matter, does it. Even if Edgeworth is the only one, he's still there, because some Death Eaters... went too far, or took out their revenge, or anger, or a thousand petty stupid reasons, none of them reasons to kill anyone. (Especially not Edgeworth's father, who he knows from his own memories--and this thought is a little traitorous to what Sirius is and what he stands for. But why not be a little more traitorous, right? He's come so far today alone.)]
Saying you're willing to die if they want you to--that's stupid.
[And that's not just paying lip service to the idea; he does know; it is stupid. And yet he can't help but think it would be right. In some small way.]
But if they knew...They would hate me. Far and away more than they'd even hate someone like - like Malfoy. Because I never helped them. Wouldn't they?
[Somehow, he's ended back in a role that's nearly-- well, it isn't comforting. It's more a part of challenge, answering Edgeworth's misgivings with a steadiness that maybe he ought not to give.]
You couldn't even help yourself. What were you going to do for them then? If they're dwelling in the past, that's not your problem either--and you shouldn't be dwelling in it either.
[He says it, gruffly, hunching over himself as he digs his watch out of his pocket. It's a heavy silver thing, made in the same style as his lighter. Compulsively, he rubs a thumb over its surface before he pops it open.]
I was being sarcastic. Guess I'm as shit at expressing myself as you are. How long are they going to keep us in here?
I'm not certain if you've noticed, Black, but most students there would sooner disembowel themselves than give me the time of day. Let alone throw me a parade.
[He shakes his head.]
A peek into the secret world of the Gryffindors: they don't like those who tell on them.
no subject
Date: 2013-10-31 05:07 pm (UTC)Just say you're doing it in his memory. Then it becomes less selfish. It's a bloody tribute.
[He ashes his cigarette again, slowly.]
But I don't think getting rid of the Statute would change anything. Not really.
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Date: 2013-10-31 06:34 pm (UTC)It would give them the chance to fight back against us. After everything we've done to them, I think they ought to have the right to decide whether or not to retaliate.
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Date: 2013-10-31 09:47 pm (UTC)And you think we deserve that--for 'everything we've done'. Rounded up and burnt at the stake, if they think that's what is required.
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Date: 2013-11-01 02:31 am (UTC)I'm not the only orphan this war has made. And at least I know why my dad ended up dead; others have grown up without knowing anything.
[A pause.]
I don't know if we deserve it. But if they decided it was necessary, I'd be willing to face it.
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Date: 2013-11-01 06:28 am (UTC)Well, then we'll put you in the group of volunteers. Because I didn't fucking do anything to anyone, so I'm not dying for no reason, just because some-- kid wants to take it out on me.
no subject
Date: 2013-11-01 11:38 am (UTC)And so he confesses, miserably:]
I'm the only one who can even fight back. Out of all the kids I grew up knowing. All the rest of them, from home, from the orphanage, would just be killed if the Death Eaters came to their town. And I can't even tell them. I have to lie to their faces.
no subject
Date: 2013-11-01 03:22 pm (UTC)[But that doesn't matter, does it. Even if Edgeworth is the only one, he's still there, because some Death Eaters... went too far, or took out their revenge, or anger, or a thousand petty stupid reasons, none of them reasons to kill anyone. (Especially not Edgeworth's father, who he knows from his own memories--and this thought is a little traitorous to what Sirius is and what he stands for. But why not be a little more traitorous, right? He's come so far today alone.)]
Saying you're willing to die if they want you to--that's stupid.
no subject
Date: 2013-11-01 06:56 pm (UTC)[And that's not just paying lip service to the idea; he does know; it is stupid. And yet he can't help but think it would be right. In some small way.]
But if they knew...They would hate me. Far and away more than they'd even hate someone like - like Malfoy. Because I never helped them. Wouldn't they?
no subject
Date: 2013-11-01 09:27 pm (UTC)[Somehow, he's ended back in a role that's nearly-- well, it isn't comforting. It's more a part of challenge, answering Edgeworth's misgivings with a steadiness that maybe he ought not to give.]
You couldn't even help yourself. What were you going to do for them then? If they're dwelling in the past, that's not your problem either--and you shouldn't be dwelling in it either.
no subject
Date: 2013-11-01 09:34 pm (UTC)I'm sorry. It wasn't my intent to make you into my...confessor.
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Date: 2013-11-03 03:50 pm (UTC)Should've thought of that before you got yourself into my head, then.
no subject
Date: 2013-11-03 06:46 pm (UTC)[He draws a hand over his eyes, letting out an unhappy sigh.]
This is what comes of smoking.
no subject
Date: 2013-11-04 03:54 pm (UTC)[This being accidental brain-links and knowing all of each other's secrets--though he doesn't say that; it's too much to actually acknowledge it.]
Sorry I led you down this path, then. You'd think what I did for you would outweigh the vice.
no subject
Date: 2013-11-04 04:06 pm (UTC)[He says that awkwardly, and then looks up, suddenly all painful earnestness:]
And you have done a great deal for me. I - ought to have acknowledged that.
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Date: 2013-11-04 05:37 pm (UTC)[He says it, gruffly, hunching over himself as he digs his watch out of his pocket. It's a heavy silver thing, made in the same style as his lighter. Compulsively, he rubs a thumb over its surface before he pops it open.]
I was being sarcastic. Guess I'm as shit at expressing myself as you are. How long are they going to keep us in here?
no subject
Date: 2013-11-04 10:50 pm (UTC)I...don't know. What time is it?
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Date: 2013-11-05 09:56 am (UTC)[He sighs, hugely, and leans back in his chair again, shoving his watch back into his pocket.]
Can you imagine going back to Hogwarts after this?
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Date: 2013-11-05 12:33 pm (UTC)God. No. I can't even imagine how the other students would react.
no subject
Date: 2013-11-05 04:45 pm (UTC)Ah, you forget. You defeated the Dark Lord. They're going to have a parade for you.
no subject
Date: 2013-11-05 05:12 pm (UTC)I'm not certain if you've noticed, Black, but most students there would sooner disembowel themselves than give me the time of day. Let alone throw me a parade.
[He shakes his head.]
A peek into the secret world of the Gryffindors: they don't like those who tell on them.
no subject
Date: 2013-11-05 08:17 pm (UTC)[Gryffindors, man. He rolls his eyes a little.]
Not to stray too far off topic, but I still can't believe you're in with them.
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Date: 2013-11-05 11:51 pm (UTC)[He looks away and hopes this won't earn him any wrath.]
I still can't believe you're in with the Slytherins.
no subject
Date: 2013-11-06 03:38 am (UTC)Yeah. Well. Doubt I will be, after this.
no subject
Date: 2013-11-06 12:04 pm (UTC)That's the part of what I said that you took issue with?
no subject
Date: 2013-11-06 03:50 pm (UTC)Should there have been something else?
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