[A bit of a braggart actually goes right to the top of the list of George Traits, but really only a braggart on things that most people--normal people--could care less about, Scrabble being one of those things. The title makes George good for crossword help, provided he's kept from taking over the whole thing and trying to do it in ink. The title is bad for just about every other reason, but it would be a low blow to say something about achievements to date and how photos in the papers from when you were fifteen years of age doesn't count for very much when you've aged significantly beyond that--and so Mitchell keeps that comment to himself, because he really is a good friend (who doesn't want to deal with an irritable George calling him out for that low blow).]
No, yeah, you don't, and it's really easy to ignore the two of you when you set up the board and sigh about how you wish there were just one other person t' play, wouldn't that be nice-- yeah, that's not manipulative or distracting at all.
Perhaps Nina will be your slum lord for you. Let's ask her when she comes round.
You're joking, of course. Have you met Nina? Do you think for a moment she would lose at Monopoly? She's got a killer instinct.
[That, though, is said with fondness rather than with any sort of disapproval or even with fear. He's disgustingly, foully, sugary proud of his Nina, and even loves her taunts when they're playing strip poker and he's down to his boxers and she's still got just about anything.
He considers telling Mitchell about that one...but no, best not to make him madly jealous. As he would be.]
Well, all right, what about charades? At the party. We could be on the same team and clean up.
[Yes, jealous is the word for what Mitchell would be. And while it might actually be worth it to watch George get beaten at Monopoly (with sort of the same satisfaction you might get from watching an evil king get beheaded or something along those lines), it would still involve Monopoly. The farther he is from that game, the better.
And besides, he really does quite like charades.]
Us being on the same team, you think everyone would go for that? Resign themselves to the slaughter? [He grins a little, scratching at his cheek as he considers that.] Ah, well, if they're too stupid t' know better, that's not our fault.
We'll slaughter them. [And he grins at George, finally pleased with that one. They do make a good team.]
I bet we could pretend to be bollocks at first, complete shit, don't you think? And then we could talk about putting money down on it, like hustlers do with billiards or some such thing.
[George's eyes light up just a little bit. It's not the actual benefit of getting one over on other people so much as the act of doing so that he's keen on. He would never actually steal anyone's money, but there's an undeniable romanticism in pulling some of the tricks he's seen on The Real Hustle.]
Then, round three, we manage to pull off communicating The Importance of Being Earnest or As I Lay Dying or something else like that.
[There is some questionable morality involved with swindling money out of your party guests, but at the same time... the chance to do, on some small scale, some real hustling of their own is not lost on Mitchell either. It would be cool--just to say they'd done it. Mitchell has done big time stuff. This is more about the experience.
He sits up a little, interest clearly piqued.]
We could do that. We could actually do that. [He grins, and leans back again, shaking his head in admiration.] Ah, listen t' you, you're a regular Valfierno under all of it, aren't you. Killer instincts of your own. And on your own party guests!
Killer instincts, nothing. Just - a sense of adventure, that's all, and a keenness to keep people entertained. It's about providing entertainment at the party.
[But he's grinning in return, way too excited for this.]
Bet we could pull a few other things, too. Would Annie go in on it, do you think? I bet we could come up with something really tricky if we had invisibility on our side.
If we tell it to her right, she might go for it. Sometimes she gets a kick out of tricking people, y'know. She's got a sense of humor.
[And sometimes she gets self-righteous and irritated that she's basically a parlor trick, and then she pouts. But right now, Mitchell is glutted with self-confidence in their abilities as con men. If they can clean up in charades, then they can win Annie over.
Though a second thought occurs to him then, and he frowns a little.]
'Course, that means inviting more people and fewer ghosts. And we run into a bit of a problem there.
[And George opens his mouth to deliver his devastating counter-argument to that objection - and then the wind quite goes out of his sails as he realizes that Mitchell is completely right on that count. For Annie to help them - and they'd have to have her help them, he realizes, it would have to have all three of them in together or else it wouldn't be any good at all - it would have to be more humans. And inviting humans into this house...No. He doesn't want it.
So, instead:]
Right. Well, she wouldn't go in for it if we were doing it at her party, anyways. So - instead we go elsewhere.
[Also a good point. If they're having a party for Annie, then it ought to be about Annie, with no other distractions.
Or humans. Though maybe that's less of an Annie thing, and more of a them sort of thing. That and they don't actually know that many people, supernatural or otherwise, which is a far more depressing reality.
Oh, but hang on--]
Elsewhere? Like to where, to a charades competition? A pub, and hope they've got a tin of topics and a bunch of grown men just itching to play party games?
Well - they - they might! I'm sure there are a few pubs that have that...And we could suggest it if they don't -
[But...No, that's ridiculous, of course they wouldn't...And if the two of them were the people to suggest the game, then, well, people would know they were up to something.]
Or...Well...Right, no. No, that won't work at all.
[He droops a little. There go his dreams of being a con man. He could have made a great one.]
[He lets George work that one out for himself--lets him arrive at that final eventual conclusion of no--and nods, sympathetically, as he relaxes back onto the sofa once more. It is an unfortunate final truth that they must face.]
Well, there's always livin' vicariously via the television, which we've done all right with so far.
[A beat; he grins a little, studying a loose bit of yarn on his glove rather than look up and meet George's eyes.]
Never would've worked anyway. Annie wouldn't have been likely to actually agree, she'd start on about using her "powers for good" or whatever Spiderman shit she wanted to talk. And you're an awful liar anyways.
I am an excellent liar! Or - well - I - I could be. If I wanted to be. I just don't want to be! All right? So I don't - I don't - I won't - I can lie! No one's found out about my condition, have they.
[Because, again, they don't have friends, because why make friends you're going to have to lie to or, inadvertently, eat. But rather than dwell on that depressing thought--]
[He's on the verge of laughing now; he picks up his mug of tea and takes a sip, trying to disguise that somewhat. George doesn't like being laughed at--who does, yeah, but George is particularly screechy about it sometimes.]
D'you know the definition of the word, George, because--generally--a lie is meant t' be something untrue. We've already established you're crap at lying, so saying that as if it's a lie...
[Who could have seen this coming? George gets screechy. Immediately.]
Mitchell, I am not crap at lying! I - I - I am marvelous at lying, and we also established nothing so I can see that you are a very good liar since you - you lied right there, right then, and - I - you - Stop laughing, it's not funny!
[Yes, this was sort of expected, and he winces a little--but he's also laughing still, sorry George--]
One of these days, mate, I'm going t' record you, you're going to see exactly why I'm laughing-- it's all right, you can be crap at lying, it's really all right. We'll handle the lying for you. You can do the, uh, tidying up afterwards.
Is that what I'm good for for you? Doing the tidying? Oh, sure, George, he's good for his skill with getting up the grime from the grout, isn't he, we can keep him around for that -
[Oh, and now they're approaching the sonic levels that only dogs can here, and that's not even a dogs-and-werewolves joke, that's just George, hitting the high notes, so to speak, and Mitchell winces as he leans back, sticking his little finger in his ear and jimmying it around a bit. Christ.]
All right, all right, calm down-- keep it together-- you know you're good for more than that-- after all, who would do the wash and the cooking and all--
[But before George shatters every bit of glassware in the house, as well as the sound barrier, probably, Mitchell sits forward with a placating gesture. Shhh.]
Kidding! You're a valuable integral part of our criminal mastermind team--and not for the tidying or the wash or the fussy bits. Just because you're integral. We are a unified team. All right?
Oh, yes, of course. Unified. You're just trying to placate me, and I'm going to have none of it, Mitchell, I'm not going to be taken in by you trying to placate me. It's fine, George is only good for the wash, I understand completely, why would I ever think differently -
[But his voice has gone down a good hundred hertz at this point, and he's more pouting than ranting now. In spite of his oaths that he can't be placated...he's perfectly placated.]
[But he is going to come out on top on this one, he can feel it--George has already settled down a bit, and his voice isn't near as screamy, though he's doing that annoyed Mitchell that he does when he's good and properly irritated, but he can work him down from that as well.
Conspiratorially, he leans forward.]
Who set up the DVD player? Eh? Wasn't me, I'm shit with technology, and it spazzes out when Annie tries too much with it. And--and!--who remembered to change the clocks for daylight savings. And-- [A little louder, in case George tries to butt in; this is the cherry on top of the argument and must be heard--] --and who is going t' make the finest cake anyone in this house has ever seen, and, likely will ever see again?
Nah. You'd better stick to it. I think I spazz 'em out a little as well, some sort of bein'-- dead thing--
[He waggles his fingers, vaguely. This is a bad excuse and he knows it. But George's "it's really easy" lessons are never in fact really easy, and George will probably end up taking apart the bloody DVD player to explain it from the core, and, you know, there are about six hundred problems with that one. Most of these problems are DVDs, on a shelf up in Mitchell's room, that he would very much like to watch, and not have to worry about George taking out cogs and gears and things when he wants to watch.]
So, uh. That's that. Hey, here, tell you what, mate, you make a list of cake things, I'll go to the shop for you. How's that.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
carisma_sensei
because it isn't real money and at the end everyone throws it in the air and cheers like it's 1999!
Date: 2013-05-14 06:48 pm (UTC)No, yeah, you don't, and it's really easy to ignore the two of you when you set up the board and sigh about how you wish there were just one other person t' play, wouldn't that be nice-- yeah, that's not manipulative or distracting at all.
Perhaps Nina will be your slum lord for you. Let's ask her when she comes round.
I hated 1999
Date: 2013-05-14 09:46 pm (UTC)[That, though, is said with fondness rather than with any sort of disapproval or even with fear. He's disgustingly, foully, sugary proud of his Nina, and even loves her taunts when they're playing strip poker and he's down to his boxers and she's still got just about anything.
He considers telling Mitchell about that one...but no, best not to make him madly jealous. As he would be.]
Well, all right, what about charades? At the party. We could be on the same team and clean up.
you are such a downer.......
Date: 2013-05-15 09:38 am (UTC)And besides, he really does quite like charades.]
Us being on the same team, you think everyone would go for that? Resign themselves to the slaughter? [He grins a little, scratching at his cheek as he considers that.] Ah, well, if they're too stupid t' know better, that's not our fault.
We'll slaughter them. [And he grins at George, finally pleased with that one. They do make a good team.]
I hate downers
Date: 2013-05-15 03:17 pm (UTC)[George's eyes light up just a little bit. It's not the actual benefit of getting one over on other people so much as the act of doing so that he's keen on. He would never actually steal anyone's money, but there's an undeniable romanticism in pulling some of the tricks he's seen on The Real Hustle.]
Then, round three, we manage to pull off communicating The Importance of Being Earnest or As I Lay Dying or something else like that.
I hate you.
Date: 2013-05-15 04:21 pm (UTC)He sits up a little, interest clearly piqued.]
We could do that. We could actually do that. [He grins, and leans back again, shaking his head in admiration.] Ah, listen t' you, you're a regular Valfierno under all of it, aren't you. Killer instincts of your own. And on your own party guests!
You're the only thing I love
Date: 2013-05-15 04:40 pm (UTC)[But he's grinning in return, way too excited for this.]
Bet we could pull a few other things, too. Would Annie go in on it, do you think? I bet we could come up with something really tricky if we had invisibility on our side.
.......awwwww well okay :>
Date: 2013-05-15 05:12 pm (UTC)[And sometimes she gets self-righteous and irritated that she's basically a parlor trick, and then she pouts. But right now, Mitchell is glutted with self-confidence in their abilities as con men. If they can clean up in charades, then they can win Annie over.
Though a second thought occurs to him then, and he frowns a little.]
'Course, that means inviting more people and fewer ghosts. And we run into a bit of a problem there.
:>
Date: 2013-05-16 01:55 pm (UTC)So, instead:]
Right. Well, she wouldn't go in for it if we were doing it at her party, anyways. So - instead we go elsewhere.
no subject
Date: 2013-05-16 05:41 pm (UTC)[Also a good point. If they're having a party for Annie, then it ought to be about Annie, with no other distractions.
Or humans. Though maybe that's less of an Annie thing, and more of a them sort of thing. That and they don't actually know that many people, supernatural or otherwise, which is a far more depressing reality.
Oh, but hang on--]
Elsewhere? Like to where, to a charades competition? A pub, and hope they've got a tin of topics and a bunch of grown men just itching to play party games?
no subject
Date: 2013-05-17 04:38 pm (UTC)[But...No, that's ridiculous, of course they wouldn't...And if the two of them were the people to suggest the game, then, well, people would know they were up to something.]
Or...Well...Right, no. No, that won't work at all.
[He droops a little. There go his dreams of being a con man. He could have made a great one.]
no subject
Date: 2013-05-17 05:34 pm (UTC)Well, there's always livin' vicariously via the television, which we've done all right with so far.
[A beat; he grins a little, studying a loose bit of yarn on his glove rather than look up and meet George's eyes.]
Never would've worked anyway. Annie wouldn't have been likely to actually agree, she'd start on about using her "powers for good" or whatever Spiderman shit she wanted to talk. And you're an awful liar anyways.
no subject
Date: 2013-05-17 05:38 pm (UTC)I am an excellent liar! Or - well - I - I could be. If I wanted to be. I just don't want to be! All right? So I don't - I don't - I won't - I can lie! No one's found out about my condition, have they.
no subject
Date: 2013-05-17 06:48 pm (UTC)[Because, again, they don't have friends, because why make friends you're going to have to lie to or, inadvertently, eat. But rather than dwell on that depressing thought--]
Right. So tell me a lie, then.
no subject
Date: 2013-05-17 09:01 pm (UTC)[Quick, think of a lie, think of a lie, don't just say "beg pardon" to buy time, think of a really good one and - ]
Beg pardon?
no subject
Date: 2013-05-17 09:42 pm (UTC)That's your lie. 'Beg pardon'.
no subject
Date: 2013-05-17 09:54 pm (UTC)[And he seems nervous and sketchy even when telling this thing, which is the truth.]
I am a very bad liar.
no subject
Date: 2013-05-18 12:48 pm (UTC)[He's on the verge of laughing now; he picks up his mug of tea and takes a sip, trying to disguise that somewhat. George doesn't like being laughed at--who does, yeah, but George is particularly screechy about it sometimes.]
D'you know the definition of the word, George, because--generally--a lie is meant t' be something untrue. We've already established you're crap at lying, so saying that as if it's a lie...
no subject
Date: 2013-05-18 03:01 pm (UTC)Mitchell, I am not crap at lying! I - I - I am marvelous at lying, and we also established nothing so I can see that you are a very good liar since you - you lied right there, right then, and - I - you - Stop laughing, it's not funny!
no subject
Date: 2013-05-19 10:27 pm (UTC)One of these days, mate, I'm going t' record you, you're going to see exactly why I'm laughing-- it's all right, you can be crap at lying, it's really all right. We'll handle the lying for you. You can do the, uh, tidying up afterwards.
no subject
Date: 2013-05-19 10:51 pm (UTC)[He only works himself into an even worse tizzy.]
Is that what I'm good for for you? Doing the tidying? Oh, sure, George, he's good for his skill with getting up the grime from the grout, isn't he, we can keep him around for that -
no subject
Date: 2013-05-20 02:47 pm (UTC)All right, all right, calm down-- keep it together-- you know you're good for more than that-- after all, who would do the wash and the cooking and all--
[But before George shatters every bit of glassware in the house, as well as the sound barrier, probably, Mitchell sits forward with a placating gesture. Shhh.]
Kidding! You're a valuable integral part of our criminal mastermind team--and not for the tidying or the wash or the fussy bits. Just because you're integral. We are a unified team. All right?
no subject
Date: 2013-05-20 03:04 pm (UTC)[But his voice has gone down a good hundred hertz at this point, and he's more pouting than ranting now. In spite of his oaths that he can't be placated...he's perfectly placated.]
no subject
Date: 2013-05-20 07:01 pm (UTC)[But he is going to come out on top on this one, he can feel it--George has already settled down a bit, and his voice isn't near as screamy, though he's doing that annoyed Mitchell that he does when he's good and properly irritated, but he can work him down from that as well.
Conspiratorially, he leans forward.]
Who set up the DVD player? Eh? Wasn't me, I'm shit with technology, and it spazzes out when Annie tries too much with it. And--and!--who remembered to change the clocks for daylight savings. And-- [A little louder, in case George tries to butt in; this is the cherry on top of the argument and must be heard--] --and who is going t' make the finest cake anyone in this house has ever seen, and, likely will ever see again?
no subject
Date: 2013-05-20 07:45 pm (UTC)I really can show you how to do the DVD player, it's really easy, you know...
no subject
Date: 2013-05-20 09:13 pm (UTC)Nah. You'd better stick to it. I think I spazz 'em out a little as well, some sort of bein'-- dead thing--
[He waggles his fingers, vaguely. This is a bad excuse and he knows it. But George's "it's really easy" lessons are never in fact really easy, and George will probably end up taking apart the bloody DVD player to explain it from the core, and, you know, there are about six hundred problems with that one. Most of these problems are DVDs, on a shelf up in Mitchell's room, that he would very much like to watch, and not have to worry about George taking out cogs and gears and things when he wants to watch.]
So, uh. That's that. Hey, here, tell you what, mate, you make a list of cake things, I'll go to the shop for you. How's that.
(no subject)
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